The focus of mindfulness-based therapy is upon recognising and accepting each moment in the present instead of jumping to hasty and often damaging reactions. This is proving to be greatly beneficial to improving our relationships with others.
How mindfulness techniques can improve our relationships
Our personal relationships–whether with friends, family or lovers–can be challenging to maintain in a way that is satisfying for everyone concerned. Disagreements can quickly escalate when we are drawn to react hastily, saying or doing things in a state of anxiety, upset or anger, that we may later regret. Learning to not only diffuse these situations but to prevent them from arising in the first place can be a difficult process.
The roots of mindfulness lie in Buddhism; particularly in the practice of meditation. Its more recent formulation in therapy owes much to those traditions, but is also combined with elements of other psychological interventions such as CBT Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and ACT Acceptance & Commitment Therapy. It has quickly established a robust scientific evidence base for a variety of concerns, including relationship problems.
Curiosity, openness and acceptance
Mindfulness-based therapies involve a focus of attention and awareness on immediate experience in a manner characterised by curiosity, openness and acceptance. Rather than rushing to react hastily to our thoughts and emotions, we are instead encouraged to acknowledge them and explore them without judgement.
The roots of mindfulness lie in the practice of meditation
These methods can positively contribute to the quality of your relationships whether you undertake them alone, or with the person with whom you are struggling to communicate or live happily with: as you become better at being attuned and empathetic with yourself, so your capacity to be attuned and empathetic with your partner increases as well. It has also been suggested that mindfulness encourages us to view stressful events (such as relationship disagreements) as challenges rather than threats. In this way, it promotes positive relationship styles that are characterised by understanding and collaboration rather than confrontation and upset.
Convincing evidence
The evidence base surrounding the use of mindfulness-based psychological therapies for relationship problems is strong and growing: researchers in North Carolina found that using mindfulness for only 8 weeks helped couples to increase relationship satisfaction, acceptance of the partner and individual well-being, also reducing relationship distress. This was following an earlier study that revealed that the same length of mindfulness-based therapy was associated with an increase in self-reported empathy, which is of course an essential component of positive interactions with others.
Research has also revealed the positive effects that mindfulness can have on people’s perception of their capacity to respond constructively to relationship stress, their emotional stress responses, and their perception of the relationship both pre- and post-conflict. Evidence is also growing that mindfulness can contribute to the adoption of more adaptive communication styles.
The House Partnership, 12th August 2014
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New psychology research has used brain scans, EEG, and measured antibody production, to reveal the biological processes that underlie the positive changes that people experience after practicing mindfulness meditation as part of psychological therapy.
In this short film from the Mental Health Foundation, Kathy Andrews talks about how she came to practise mindfulness with Professor Mark Williams. This practice has given her invaluable techniques to help overcome her depression.
Carol Cattley describes her experiences of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for depression, and how it helped her to make positive changes in her own life, where previously she never thought possible.
The psychoanalytic theory that dominated the 20th century is being overtaken by therapies in which talking interventions for depression concentrate not on what has already happened, but on thinking about what will happen in the future in a positive way.
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Evidence suggests that CBT cognitive behavioural therapy is at least as effective as medication for depression, and leads to lower relapse rates. This is because it gets to the heart of the 'vicious cycle' of negative thoughts, feelings and actions that depression can trap us in.
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Steve Blacknell, 55, used to sneak into the kitchen in the middle of the night to eat in secret. He has been recovering from bulimia for 20 years. At The House, our therapists and counsellors are experienced in helping people overcome issues with food and eating.
House Therapists are trained in a variety of approaches, and can integrate them to tailor the therapeutic experience to your particular needs and concerns. Rather than trying to match the client to a therapy, we prefer to match therapies to the client.
Schema therapy is an integrated psychological therapy, combining elements from a variety of therapies including CBT Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. It aims to challenge and correct some of the deepest maladaptive beliefs that we hold about ourselves and the world.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is the most popular form of therapy for a range of issues that fall under the umbrella term 'anxiety', using a solution-focused, 'here and now' approach to facilitate recovery. We take a look at what this means and at the evidence in its favour.
By tackling the way we think about ourselves, our bodies, and food, and using this to inform changes in our eating behaviours, CBT provides a powerful method for breaking free from the powerful grip of anxiety, guilt and shame that can control our relationship with food.
In a study that asked 515 people why they entered into sex with someone, 50% of women and 52% of men said that they hoped to trigger a longer relationship.
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A man's problems with his wife keep him awake during a whole night. An animation about insomnia, by Marie-Margaux Tsakiri-Scanatovits, promoting the short story 'Night Thoughts' by Helen Simpson, for Granta magazine's issue on feminism.
CBT is an active, collaborative, solution-focussed form of therapy combining techniques that help us to confront and correct biases and problems in the ways we think and feel; leading us to independently pursue a more fulfilling and successful life.
This powerful film by documentary filmmaker Martin Hampton introduces us to the lives of four people struggling with compulsive hoarding; each vignette more uncomfortable that the last.
Levni Yilmazis is an independent film-maker, artist and publisher. In this short animation he provides a wry how-to guide for breaking up . . . in 64 easy steps!
Social anxiety has been part of Jo's life since childhood. In this painful story she describes its pernicious effect and the vicious cycle between feelings of anxiety and sadness. But the story has a happy ending as Jo eventually discovers therapy.
Stress, at an appropriate level and duration, can be a positive influence in the workplace. However, when stressful influences are poorly managed, they can cause us to feel like we are 'treading water'. How can we use workplace pressure to our advantage?
Our psychological problems are shaped by our socio-cultural environment. In Korea, what we might refer to as 'problem anger' is known as 'fire sickness' and is seemingly caused by emotional suppression for the good of the collectivist culture
Systemic therapy looks at people not as isolated individuals, but as parts of various relationships and networks (romantic, familial, platonic, professional etc), and deals with the interactions and dynamics of these groups to improve the wellbeing of its members.
A short animation on how OCD feels to Danish artist, Joaquim Nielsen. One in fifty adults experience obsessive-compulsive behavior during their lives. While OCD can be a serious social disabling condition, it has also become a source of inspiration for some artists.
This film by the charity OCD-UK offers insight into the problems that people with OCD face, and how they experience the condition. OCD responds very well to a combination of CBT cognitive behavioral and mindfulness therapies.
CBT has been consistently shown to aid recovery from OCD in over three quarters of people who undertake it by encouraging them to change the way they think through 'cognitive restructuring', and use this to change the way they behave through 'cognitive management'.
A short video from animator Kelly Bailey on what it's like to live with panic and agoraphobia, containing recorded testimony of real people who have struggled with and overcome these fears.
Professor Paul Salkovskis, a clinical psychologist and director of the Centre for Anxiety Disorders and Trauma, discusses Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. And Karen reveals how this form of therapy helped her overcome OCD.
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Cutural and religious rituals and many of the behaviours of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) show striking similarities: washing, checking, repetition... is OCD a manifestation of a deep human need that has spun out of control?
Kadam Morten Clausen, resident teacher at the Kadampa Meditation Centre in New York, discusses how stress is all about our perceptions of others and of the world. Mindfulness practices, as encouraged at The House Partnership, can help you find a path to a life free of stress.
Levni Yilmazis is an independent film-maker, artist and publisher. This is his ironic take on the less-than-helpful advice some people give when you're experiencing depression.
Though it has been proposed that food issues such as extreme dieting, anorexia and bulimia are on the rise and influenced by media pressures, analysis of texts about and by many of history's key figures suggests that these problems have been around for centuries.
A clip from the BBC's Weird Nature series showing how Vervet Monkeys in the Caribbean have taken to stealing cocktails from people on the beach. Studies show that they have the same percentage of teetotal and alcoholic individuals as the human population.
